Today was beach day. The weather man said it was supposed to rain, thunder, and the heat was supposed to break, all while we were supposed to be at the beach. We went anyways, and it didn't rain.

Why is it that accepting that everything happens for a reason is so difficult? To simply trust in whomever you trust in with your life, and that they are doing the right thing in the long run? I try to live remembering this, but it's hard and I worry. I know I shouldn't, and it's been proven to me time and time again that my back's being watched, but I still do. Take today, for instance.

Because I chose to work at camp, I'm making absolutely no money. When pay days come around I get angry, because I know the check is never going to be enough to support myself for the next 2 weeks and allow me to save a substantial amount for school. But I do it anyways because I love it, and I want to be there for the camper that requested me back. Well, pay day came today as the session ended, and of course it wasn't enough money for me to pay for everything I need for the car and save some. However, I got help (in the form of a generous tip from a camper's parent), and now I have more money than I would have had.

I don't know what's going on but I can feel it's all for a reason. I think it's time to step back and stop worrying, to finally trust whole heartedly.